Wednesday, March 19, 2014

One of those days...

As a mom, we all have those days. The days where you feel you are doing everything wrong and you repeat yourself a million times over to deaf ears.
You're. Not. Alone.
Through my posts, I am going to be completely open and honest. Sometimes, we have days that are worse than others. Some days my son will nap more than usual or be more clingy, but one thing I have learned through my motherhood journey is to take the good with the bad and keep on moving. Now, I am absolutely no expert or have this perfected in any way. Yesterday, for example, was particularly rough. At 36 1/2 weeks pregnant, this momma is tired. I am most certainly a believer in your children can feel your mood and it reflects onto theirs. Appearantly, I wasn't keeping mine a secret very well. After the millionth time of telling my 18 month old not to stand on his chair, chasing him around the room to put a diaper back on, reminding him we do not hit the dogs with our toys, I was at my limit. Now, this isn't to say I don't have to remind him of these things every. single. day. I guess yesterday just affected me more. I haven't put much thought into the fact that we will soon have two little men around the house. But, I feel like I was slammed in the face with it all yesterday. I usually deal with my fears by sweeping them under the rug and not facing them. I had no choice yesterday, they were coming to the surface, whether I wanted them there or not. The fact is, I am scared to death about adding another munchkin into the mix. Am I going to be able to divide my time with both of them? How will Kilian feel? I am so tired already, how am I going to handle nursing through out the night and still have enough energy to keep up with my toddler? It seemed like every time I came up with a reasonable answer and I had convinced myself it wont be as hard as I think, another fear popped up. I guess where I am going with this is, everyone has fears, its all about how we handle them and how we let them affect us. Today I am choosing to conquer them, I will not let them alter how I interact with my toddler and my husband. Be strong and no matter what you are dealing with and remember no one is perfect, even if it seems like it.

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